There’s a moment in last season’s finale of “Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce” when Abby McCarthy thinks she’s having a heart attack in the middle of a nervous breakdown.
It turns out she was having her first hot flash.
While “Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce” doesn’t make light of Abby’s struggle, it reflects the way in which menopause is perceived.
“For so long, women got the message that after they were no longer able to bear children they were put out to pasture; and it’s so different now,” says Marti Noxon, 52, the series’ creator and executive producer whose upcoming projects include TV adaptations of the novels “Sharp Objects” for HBO and “Dietland” for AMC, as well as her directorial debut with “To the Bone,” a dark comedy about anorexia that stars Keanu Reeves and Lily Collins.
“So many of the women I know who are in their 40s and on into their 60s are super vibrant, they’re still dating; a lot of them are into their second marriages; some of them have young children,” she says. “It’s so compelling for me to be able to really talk about what we do not have a handbook for.”
There are hot flashes aplenty as the Bravo original scripted series returns this Wednesday for a third season, with Abby — played by 50-year-old Lisa Edelstein, the wavy-haired actress who previously starred on “House” — navigating the course as a self-help writer trying to reinvent herself while experiencing the joys and deep disappointments of relationships, career and family with the help of her best friends.
The series is one of the rare TV shows to keep the perimenopausal conversation going.
“It’s not like it’s the harbinger of doom,” says Edelstein, explaining it’s just another element of her character. “It’s part of a list — she’s wearing a cute outfit, she’s got a nice house, she’s dating, she’s going through menopause. It’s not a tragedy about the loss of relevance.”
Some women breeze through the transitional six to 10 years before their last period, at about age 51. But a majority of women will experience some form of symptom, from wild mood swings to weight gain.
The hormonal ups and downs have been fodder for laughs on television since the days of the 1970s sitcom “All in the Family.”
“If you’re going to have a change of life, you’ve got to do it right now,” impatiently demands Archie Bunker (Carroll O’Connor) of his wife, who’s having a rough go of it. “I’m going to give you just 30 seconds; now, come on, change!
“Can I finish my soup first,” Edith (Jean Stapleton) says.
“Yes, Hollywood has talked about it but it was basically made fun of,” says Ellen Dolgen, a blogger, menopause awareness advocate and co-author of the free e-book “Menopause Mondays: The Girlfriend’s Guide to Surviving and Thriving During Perimenopause and Menopause.”
She’s also behind a humorous video of a singing uterus starring Rachel Bloom of the CW’s “Crazy Ex-Girlfriend,” all with the mission of educating women about menopause as more than just a plot device on past shows like “The Golden Girls,” “That 70s Show” and “The Cosby Show.”
“Look, I’m fine with it being funny, but are we really helping women understand that there are options and that you don’t have to suffer,” Dolgen asks. “My motto is suffering in silence is out, and reaching out is in.”
But menopause isn’t the only story brewing on “Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce.”
Season 3 picks up after Delia (Necar Zadegan) is left at the altar and turns her energy to getting her career back on track. Jo (Alanna Ubach) risks business and pleasure with her sex-addicted head baker (Will Kemp), while Phoebe (Beau Garrett) deals with the consequences of rushing into marriage with J.D. (Aaron Staton). Barbara (Retta) returns with a promotion, and to celebrate she treats herself to a kitchen remodel at the hands of a sexy contractor (Malcolm-Jamal Warner). It also brings “a wonderful new love interest” (James Lesure), says Edelstein, for Abby who decides to take a crack at romance writing.
But if dating and revamping her career while being a mom weren’t enough, she’s got to start dealing with her fluctuating hormone levels — in time. The series ends with the Season 5 finale.
“NBCUniversal really pushed to tell this whole story, which is great,” Edelstein says. “Because even I felt like if this show goes on long enough, I’ll be going through menopause.”
